At the moment, It feels like two carpenters are at work somewhere in my head. One on the posterior aspect doing a number on a fictitious stubborn nail and the other doing some sand papering on my frontal lobe.
Origin of this headache is what I dunno. Going through the usual culprits-
Hunger- I ticked that box a few hours ago
Work stress- today was a pretty light day
Over thinking – I took a day off here
Sleep Deprived – I wouldn’t say that
Maybe it just this darn Bobby pins!
There’s this lone tablet of panadol extra in my bag.. It’s not enough but it’s something.
I’m currently away from home. Doing a three months posting in Ubth, Benin city.
I had a lot of anxiety before starting the posting.
It’s kinda normal. I always have anxiety starting a new phase. I would start off excited then the anxiety would set in leaving me worrying my life out.
I think the worst episode I’ve had was the one I had few days before starting house job. I was so anxious, I worried if I wouldn’t do things right or just kill my patients with one touch. My biggest worry then was how to site an IV line. Seven years after I def can’t count how many IVs I’ve put in.
I know everything always works out and turns out good but still, which each new phase I get a bout of anxiety.
Going to and living in Benin wasn’t part of my worry though. At heart, Benin is my second home in some way. I had served here (NYSC) and coincidentally in the same hospital -UBTH- but in a different department. Aside some initial adjustments then, I came to love the ancient city and even considered relocating after service but life happened.
Back then, the first few weeks I got into town I was almost depressed. There were a lot of things I didn’t get. Some major things which frustrated me were shops closing early, not finding my comfort food- bole and fish- to buy and limited public transport system late in the evenings. By the second month I had started adapting- Timed my shopping, got my bole n fish fix from Warri or improvised, found my way around evening waka. And to my surprise I started loving the city and its ways.
So going back for three months, 5 years later was welcomed.
During service I lived with a friend. It was quite a distance from work but I preferred it to the offered accommodation and I liked that it was in town so I could explore some. Also my work schedule then wasn’t as rigorous so the distance wasn’t a bother
This time around, knowing what work would entail I knew I had to be closer to the hospital. I had thought of renting a place but that didn’t work out. Thankfully, a colleague and his wife offered me a place in their apartment, and they’ve been great hosts!
I miss Seun so so much. The plan was to come with her but she had some number plates issh that I couldn’t sort out before leaving and I didn’t want plenty talk with all the necessary and unnecessary uniformed guys on the highway. I didn’t have the strength to speak grammer at each stop or the money to part with when I didn’t want to speak grammer. I never thought I would miss her being around this much.
I’m enjoying the change of environment. Despite the anxiety I looked forward to it. But at the moment I miss home. Miss my bed kraaaa. Miss bole n fish. I’m already counting down.
It’s not the city making me miss home, it’s the work mehn. I thought I knew work in UPTH… UBTH work is on another level. I haff taya.
Infact medicine haff taya me. I think I entered one chance, both with Medicine and with Anaesthesia.
Abi is it just le laziness talking.
Oh well, I’m taking one day at a time.
Anyone in Benin or it’s environs? Holla at your gurl.
Bubbles of love 💕💞💕💞